Thursday, May 17, 2007

The Terrifying Unreal

I just went in for what I thought was a job interview (I even prepared a stinking portfolio), and was offered an adjunct teaching position on the spot. This is the second time this kind of thing has happened to me, and I really want the universe to know that it scares the hell out of me. Because of course I'm going to accept the job, but what of my need to absorb the reality of it, and prepare emotionally, and decide whether I actually want to teach a remedial reading course?

I'll probably end up doing it, although as a psychological crutch I'm still giving myself official permission to back out. But the school and the people who work there just became concrete to me today, and the students aren't even shadows yet. Committing to teaching this class is like jumping into an abyss. And there isn't even that much money to grab at on the way down.

I'm scared.


Blogger Loralee Choate said...

I know it's scary and the pay sounds like suck but I know you love teaching so I am freaking excited for you!

5/17/2007 1:57 PM  
Anonymous Natasha said...

Holy crap, I'm so excited for you. You deserve this very much -- congratulations!! :)

We should get together to celebrate -- but probably just at the bar. You know, where our kind belong.

5/18/2007 3:26 PM  
Blogger Froyd said...


don't think of it as going down, think of it as a stepping stone up to better paying jobs

5/18/2007 3:50 PM  
Blogger Laura B. said...

Yay!!!!!!!!! Incredible news, Amber. Congratulations!

5/18/2007 7:32 PM  
Blogger Amber said...

Thanks for all the congratulations and the encouragement. I'm more excited about it now, and I told the manager at my job about it today, so it's official. I just wish fear wasn't such a huge part of my process of making changes and doing new things.

5/19/2007 12:08 AM  
Blogger Froyd said...

so do they choose the book for you, or how will that work? I've gotta choose the book for the class next year, and I'm terrified. it's not like I"m up to speed on the latest literature!

5/23/2007 1:03 AM  
Blogger Amber said...

For this class, the book is assigned to me. So that's easy. Actually, though, I kind of enjoyed choosing my books for the second year of GA-ing. I recommend going to the major education publishers' websites (Pearson, McGraw-Hill, etc.) and looking at their online catalogs. If you see anything you think you might like, they'll probably send you a review copy for free. Yay!

Congratulations, by the way, on your teaching job. I don't think I've acknowledged that yet.

5/23/2007 4:39 PM  
Blogger Froyd said...

The books assigned? Lucky. Review copies...for free? Brilliant!

5/24/2007 9:59 AM  

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